Why Getting Back With Your Ex Can Ruin Your Life

Jessica Rubin

Many of us seem to go through the same self-destructive cycles when it comes to relationships: we date someone, it doesn’t work, we break-up and then a few weeks later we go right back to that same person. Even those gifted and brilliant souls who manage to stay away from their ex get tempted one or two times after a split. But maybe this study will discourage you the next time you pick up your phone to send your old boyfriend a drunk text message.

Gizmodo uncovered research done by MedicalXpress that shows couples who repeatedly go back together are more “impulsive” when it comes to making major decisions in their relationship. They’re more willing to jump into sharing an apartment or having a kid without thinking it through (which can clearly lead to a troubled and uncertain future).

But you may be surprised to find that those in what the study calls “cyclical relationships” also have lower self-esteem. We see numerous examples of these yo-yo relationships in the media (O.C. fans spent years watching Ryan and Marissa play the on-again-off-again game), yet they’re something you should absolutely try to avoid.

So the next time your ex pops up on your Facebook timeline, grab a friend and head out to your neighborhood bar. We’ve found there’s nothing like a Whiskey Sour to heal the wounds of relationships past.