It’s bizarre to think that, as recently as 10 years back, the concept of online dating was almost embarrassingly taboo. Now, a societal social media addiction and one literal pandemic later, we’ve grown to not only embrace dating apps as viable options, but to hold them as the norm. In fact, we don’t just turn to the digital world to get dates—we use social media for dating advice, too. And when it comes to creators both millennials and Gen Z trust for dating insight, none compare to TikTok’s Tinx.
Tinx, a.k.a. Christina Najjar, is a 30-year-old social media starlet known for everything from daily vlogging to breaking down her “rich mom” starter packs. She also opens up to her 1.4 million TikTok followers in regards to all things romance and relationships. She’s the first to share her personal dating highs and lows, not to mention a bevy of theories on decoding modern date culture.
When Tinx stopped by the STYLECASTER offices last week, I took one look at her outfit and I knew right away she was someone whose advice I could trust. A confident dresser is a confident person, and her fall ‘fit was strong. Clad in a navy Mongolian fur-trimmed leather coat from Cinq à Sept, coordinating navy leather pants from AGOLDE and a wine-colored patent 151 Mercer Bag by Tory Burch, Tinx looked more like a seasoned Soho socialite than a TikToker fresh off her flight from Los Angeles.
“I literally just put these on this morning and I’m never taking them off,” she said of her new favorite leather pants, which went immediately into my Revolve online cart.
But I digress—after a short sartorial segue, we got down and dirty talking all things dating. And just in time for cuffing season! Ever one to help her followers navigate the ins and outs of the dating world, Tinx shared all her secrets on how to survive (and thrive!) during cuffing season, arguably the most important time to swipe right.
From dating red flags to booty call attire to her hot take on the pros and cons of ghosting, read on for Tinx’s Guide to Cuffing Season. If you land a relationship by 2022, you know who to thank.
On Choosing Strong Dating App Photos:
“If you’re a guy, please don’t hold any fish in any of your pictures, because we’ve had enough of that! It’s time to call it quits with the fish-holding pictures.”
“My biggest tip for dating app pictures is to pick pictures that really represent who you are as a person—not just the ones where you look snatched and hot, but ones that show your personality. Do you love walking, do you love having fun at parties, do you love skiing? Definitely show your personality…again, except for if your personality is fishing, in which case, please pick something else.”
On A Healthy First Date Mindset
“Don’t put the other person on a pedestal. Even if you’ve done some sneaky Instagram stalking and you think that they’re super hot, it’s OK to be excited, but please don’t put them on a pedestal, because then it will just build it up too much and make you nervous.”
“Go into it, be excited, but really notice if they ask you questions, notice how they make you feel—because that’s the most important thing. Are you laughing, are you having fun, are you learning things? Did the date go by quickly because you were having fun? Those are the types of things to look out for. Not, like, how tall he is. Who cares?”
Ghosting is Small Dick Energy.
On Wanting To Ghost Someone
“Ghosting is Small Dick Energy. I don’t care how bad the date was! Have the courage to send a text, and the text should go like this: Hey, it was great getting to know you. I really respect you, which is why I want to be upfront. I am not feeling a romantic vibe, but I think you’re great. Good luck out there. Xx. Easy!”
On What To Do If You’re Getting Ghosted
“Match their energy. If you’re feeling that someone isn’t giving you the right amount of energy, then pull back a little bit. If you feel like they’re pulling back, go on another date. Open up that dating app, start swiping! Don’t put all your eggs in one basket until you’re 100 percent certain that that person is investing the same amount of time and energy in you.”
On the date, I always say, do they ask you questions and listen to the answer?
On Dating Red Flags
“If someone doesn’t respect your time. If they try to book a last-minute date, like, Oh are you free tonight for a random drink? Or if they only text you on weekends and say When we hanging? No sir, I’m not a monkey, we are not hanging at all. I really think that that’s an early indicator of if someone respects your time or not.”
“And then on the date, I always say, do they ask you questions and listen to the answer? A date can kind of feel like a job interview with cocktails, so you really want to make sure that they’re actually listening to you and responding to what you’re saying, versus just talking about themselves and firing off the basics, like, So where did you grow up?”
On Dating Green Flags
“It’s really how someone makes you feel on the date. If you leave a date and you feel like you were funny, you were happy and you had fun, that’s a good sign because it means the other person put you at ease and you felt comfortable being yourself.”
“You’ve gotta change the question. It’s not, Does he like me? It’s Do I like them? Do I feel comfortable around them? Really pay attention to those first 10 minutes after you walk out of the bar. Do you feel like Oh, that was great, I’m funny, I’m cool, or do you feel like Oh, god I wish I hadn’t said that. If they’re making you feel nervous or stressed out, they’re probably not the one.”
It’s not, ‘Does he like me?’ It’s ‘Do I like them?’
On What To Wear When Seeing An Ex At Your Local Bar
“Full head-to-toe leather, platform heels, fly in a makeup artist from New York or L.A.! No, I’m just kidding—wear whatever you feel beautiful in. So for me that’s always leather pants, a cool sweater if it’s this time of year, some great boots, maybe a little dress and an amazing coat. Just feel your best.”
On What To Wear For A First Date
“I’m a big leather pants gal. I think leather pants and a cool top is a no-fail option. Just something that says, I’m fun, but I’m chic, but I’m cool, but I’m sporty. You know!”
On What To Wear For A Booty Call
“My answer is gonna be controversial! I go for a really cute, oversized, soft cardigan or a sweatshirt. Something slouchy, and maybe a cute legging to snatch the bum. Obviously, cool sneakers so that when you walk home in the morning you can get your steps in and it’s very efficient. You’re walk-of-shaming, but you’re also getting your steps in. Stop, get yourself a coffee, high-five yourself—I call it a Walk of Fame.”