Whether it’s a cheesy compliment laid on way too thick at a bar, or a crass message typed into [insert online dating platform of choice], there’s something undeniably laughable about the storied pickup line. And although every woman under the sun has their own cringeworthy experience to share, we still can’t seem to get enough. Which is why stumbling upon a new Instagram account dedicated entirely to mortifying versions found on Tinder was like striking virtual gold. Aptly called Tinder Nightmares, the account shares screenshots of seriously sleazy conversations with its 455,000 plus followers.
From the upfront, “Are you gonna let me lick whipped cream off you or nah cuz if not let’s end this here,” to the thought-provoking, “Would you rather fight one horse-size duck, or 100 duck-sized horses?” to the romantic, “I wasn’t feeling well this morning, so I called my doctor and he recommended I should take more Vitamin U, and the straight-up creepy “You would look good in my cage,” these guys don’t waste any time cutting to the chase.
To be completely honest, the replies are often just as funny as the pickup lines. In fact, this might just be the best thing about Tinder.
Thank you, internet.