Swifties, we need to have a little talk. Apparently, there’s a photo of Taylor Swift from a recent meet-and-greet in which she wore an oversized sweater dress and then bent over to get close to a fan, giving herself a little tummy pooch. And apparently, that means people are going off the rails with theories that she’s pregnant and her new single, “Gorgeous,” is somehow a pregnancy announcement. I can feel a migraine coming on from how wild this theory is.
OK, so first thing that we need to clear up, though you’d think it’d be obvious: Every time a celebrity takes an unflattering photo, we cannot jump to the conclusion that they’re pregnant. That’s seriously rude and messed up. Take a hot second and imagine someone takes a photo of you after you eat Chipotle and how it would feel if millions of people saw it and started calling you pregnant. Everyone. Just chill.
Secondly, have you even listened to “Gorgeous?” If not, I’ve taken the liberty of reprinting some of the lyrics below. Sorry if anyone is, like, saving it or something and this is a spoiler.
“You should take it as a compliment / That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk.” If this is about a baby, Swift is already in the running for worst mom ever, and this is literally the first line of the song.
“Whiskey on ice, Sunset and Vine / You’ve ruined my life by not being mine.” There’s a theme here, and it is alcohol—something you don’t have when you’re pregnant.
“Guess I’ll just stumble on home to my cats / Alone / Unless you wanna come along.”
Generally, you’re not supposed to allow your baby to choose whether to come home with you, and especially not when you’re threatening to passive-aggressively stumble there yourself to hang out alone with your cats.
In conclusion: It’s just a photo of Taylor Swift in a not-the-most-flattering, but probably-super-comfy outfit. That is all.
Originally posted on SheKnows.com