6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone

6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone
Photo: Cierra Miller.

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Orgasms can be pretty damn elusive—and orgasms from penetration (and just penetration) are some of the most elusive around. Anyone with a vagina probably knows this reality well, but in case you needed scientific evidence: A truly massive 2015 study found that only 18 percent of women reported being able to orgasm from penetration alone. So if you’ve done the penetration thing over, and over, and over again to no avail, rest assured knowing you’re not alone. You’re actually in the majority.

What’s the deal here? Natasha Chinn, M.D., a New Jersey-based OB-GYN, tells StyleCaster it all has to do with the way we get turned on. There are a bunch of erogenous zones in the body, and pleasure points tend to be more sensitive than others. The clitoris, for example, is chock full of nerve endings that make it something of a stimulation sweet-spot. (It should come as no surprise, then, that 37 percent of women in that 2015 study reported needing clitoral stimulation to orgasm. Or that an additional 36 percent of them said that while they didn’t need clitoral stimulation, it definitely made things better.)

The vagina, on the other hand, is a bit more complicated. Many suggest that the key to penetrative orgasms lies within the G-spot—a pleasure sensor on the anterior wall of the vagina. (There’s some debate about whether the G-spot is just an extension of the clitoris, or whether it’s its own cluster of nerves. What’s generally agreed upon is this: There lies a sensitive cluster of nerves somewhere in the vagina, often on the anterior wall of the vagina, and when stimulated, it feels great.) The issue is, that pleasure sensor can be hard to get to. “Oftentimes, the girth of the penis [or strap-on], as well as the angle during sex, isn’t ideal for a [penetrative orgasm],” Chinn explains.

Since those nerve endings you’re looking for line the vaginal walls, you want to stimulate those areas as much as possible—which some penises, toys, and positions do better than others. And since the clitoris tends to be—as we’ve already thoroughly discussed—an absolute gold mine for pleasure, it makes sense to find ways to stimulate it during penetrative sex, too. “Positions where the penis [or toy] is angled correctly, or where the woman is on top and can get stimulation from the clitoris, will [likely] be more successful in achieving orgasm,” Chinn says. The following six sex positions take full advantage of just that.

So if you’ve struggled to orgasm from penetration thus far, don’t sweat it. You’re not the only one—far from it. And these sex positions might help you get a little closer. (Worth remembering: Everyone’s anatomy is shaped differently. So something that works for your vagina might not work for someone else’s—and that applies to your partner’s anatomy, too. What works for you with one partner might not work for you with another, so open up the conversation and be willing to experiment to figure out what feels best for you right now.)

STYLECASTER | 6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone

Cierra Miller.

1. Straddle and Stimulate

Straddle sex just feels spicy. Since straddling is hands-free for the person on top, there are so many opportunities to provide the straddler with clitoral stimulation, while both parties are finding pleasure.

This one’s similar to cowgirl—but instead of sitting upright, press the front of your body to your partner’s. And instead of moving up and down, try rocking forward and backward while grinding your pubic bone into your partner’s body. (This should add an extra dose of clitoral stimulation that can make orgasming a whole lot easier.)

Another option? Sit upright as you would in traditional cowgirl, and use your fingers to stimulate your clitoris while riding your partner. (You can even use your other hand to reach around and stimulate your partner’s genitals, too. Look at you multi-tasking!) If you want your partner to get a little handsy, guide their hands to your clitoris—or simply communicate that’s what you want.

STYLECASTER | 6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone

Cierra Miller.

2. Spooning + Vibrator

Spooning sex doesn’t only have to be an option when you’re feeling low-energy. It can be fun and ultra-stimulating, no matter your mood, energy level or the time of day.

While being penetrated from behind, either with a penis or a strap-on, try bringing a clitoral vibrator into the mix. Just pull it out while going through the motions of spooning sex to put all kinds of attention on your clitoris (while enjoying all the joys of one of life’s snuggliest positions).

STYLECASTER | 6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone

Cierra Miller.

3. Sixty-Nine 

Everyone’s favorite number is also an excellent position for non-penetrative fun.

Here’s the trick: If the person you’re connecting with doesn’t already know what you’re into, communicate that you’d like them to focus on your clitoris. If you’re on top, push your body further back and position your clitoris right above their mouth (you can feel it out as you go). This should allow you to rock forward and backward a little, putting you in control of how much pressure there is.

If your partner has a penis, this position allows for a penetration-mimicking oral session provided by you. If your partner has a vagina, you can provide them with the same clitoral stimulation you’re asking for. Clitoral stimulation all around!

STYLECASTER | 6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone

Cierra Miller.

4. Tilted Forward Reverse Cowgirl

Reverse cowgirl is a power pose if we’ve ever seen one.

Start by straddling your partner, but instead of facing them, face away from them. Once you’re ready, place the penis or dildo inside of you, and lean your body forward a little bit. Not only does this provide a glorious view of your ass (hey—no shame in that!), but it’ll also let you take advantage of a little clitoral stimulation from the bottom part of your partner’s shaft (or the shaft of your partner’s strap-on).

Finding a groove in the movement might be tricky, but just think of it as your normal straddle position—and just imagine that you’re leaning forward the same way you might to kiss your partner. Only in this position, you’re leaning forward to stimulate your clitoris, instead of your partner’s mouth. Go get that orgasm!

STYLECASTER | 6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone

Cierra Miller.

5. Close Contact Missionary

Missionary tends to get a bad rap as one of life’s most boring sex positions, but let’s be honest—no position is boring if both parties are into it.

Get up close and personal, missionary style, with your partner on top. But instead of your partner elevating their upper body and hips, ask them to lie stomach-to-stomach with you. Not only will this provide additional closeness (aw!), it’ll also allow your partner to press their pubic bone into yours—stimulating your clitoris while giving them all the leverage they need to penetrate you. If you can, try wrapping your arms or legs around their lower waist to pull them in closer. This should put even more pressure on your clitoris.

Want to spice things up a little more? Try placing a pillow underneath your lower back to provide more leverage—and more clitoral stimulation. You can also grab your partner’s ass, or—if they’re into it—engage in a little anal play. (You’re basically in the perfect position for butt stuff. And really, why shouldn’t your partner enjoy a multi-dimensional stimulation experience while you do, too?)

STYLECASTER | 6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone6 Sex Positions for People Who Have Trouble Orgasming from Penetration Alone

Cierra Miller.

6. Pinned Doggy Style

Doggy style is an absolute classic—and for good reason. It offers all kinds of pleasure to both parties involved.

While normal doggy style calls for the person being penetrated (so probably, you) to be on their hands and knees, try lowering your body down instead. Lie flat on your stomach, spread your legs and position your hand in between your vagina and the bed (or couch, or wherever else you are). This allows your partner to penetrate you from behind, while you take control of your own clitoral stimulation.

If you’ve ever masturbated while lying on your stomach, this should seem pretty familiar to you. In fact, it’s literally the same thing—except this time, you’re being penetrated while you’re at it.

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