Real Estate Porn: Joel Schumacher’s SoCal Getaway and the Most Expensive Apartment in Manhattan

Blair Pfander
Real Estate Porn: Joel Schumacher’s SoCal Getaway and the Most Expensive Apartment in Manhattan
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Whether or not you’re a captain of industry, few pleasures in life are as uncomplicated as clicking through impossibly luxe (and ridiculously expensive) real estate listings.
This week, we’re watching old “Batman” movies to ready ourselves for director Joel Schumacher’s Carpinteria mansion, which features rustic wood beams, a U-shaped swimming pool, and secluded guest house (all befitting a modern-day Bruce Wayne).
We’re also hoping for fair weather for a sojourn at this South Carolina mini-mansion, which is built atop a private boat dock (yet somehow manages to have its own wine vault and separate guest quarters).
Finally, we’re perfecting our air-kisses for this impossibly cool midcentury modern pad on Sunset Strip, which features starlet pre-requisites like sliding glass doors, reflecting pools, and killer views of downtown LA.
Which new listings have you drooling this week? Tell us in the comments below!

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SAG HARBOR, LONG ISLAND: We don't know about you, but this sleek and chic Sag Harbor mini-mansion is our idea of the ultimate Barbie Beach Dreamhouse, with massive floor-to-ceiling windows, double-sided fireplaces, freestanding marble bathtubs, and a massive pool and cabana house. $3,495,000 at Corcoran.

Photo: Corcoran/Corcoran

BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS: This 4,000 square foot condo is the only residential space available inside the historic Charles Street Meeting House (the first racially integrated church in the US). The landmark may be 206 years old, but vaulted ceilings, exposed beams, and floor to ceiling windows feel luxe in any century. $4,900,000 at Coldwell Banker.

Photo: Zillow/Zillow

CARPINTERIA, CALIFORNIA: Joel Schumacher (who directed a trio of Batman flicks) has listed his rustic-luxe Carpinteria retreat, which boasts sweeping mountain views and dense gardens. The property may have a woodsy appeal, but a U-shaped swimming pool, massive master suite, and secluded guest house add serious luxury. $7,250,000 at Riskin Associates.

Photo: Montecito Real Estate/Montecito Real Estate

PALM BEACH, FLORIDA: This 1928 Palm Beach estate is a landmarked mansion, and comes with livin' large details like a tiled bar, massive walk-in closet, and a private interior courtyard—perfect for escaping in the great outdoors when the nearby beach just won't do. $5,700,000 at Corcoran.

Photo: Corcoran/Corcoran

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA: Perched on a Los Feliz hilltop, this Frank Lloyd Wright designed estate—that has housed the likes of Leonard Bernstein and Diane Keaton—is the perfect low-key addition to a high-end real estate collection, with a small outdoor swimming pool, polished concrete floors, and stark white walls. $4,495,0000 at Hilton & Hyland.

Photo: Hilton & Hyland/Hilton & Hyland

NEW YORK, NEW YORK: Developed by former Studio 54 guru, Ian Schrager, the lavishly decorated eigth floor of the distinctive 40 Bond building (you know it for its emerald-hued glass exterior) is one of the most luxe listings in New York City, and comes with spendy details like "Austrian smoked oak wood" in the kitchen and 20-foot deep terraces. $27,000,000 at Douglas Elliman.

Photo: Douglas Elliman/Douglas Elliman

NEW YORK, NEW YORK: Of course, when it comes to luxe Manhattan listings, nothing can touch the penthouse of the Pierre Hotel, which, at $125 million, is the most expensive listing in the city by a landslide, and comes with suitably opulent features like a grand living room (formerly the ballroom), five master bedrooms, and five wood burning fireplaces. $125,000,000 at Sothebys.

Photo: Sothebys/Sothebys

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA: Formerly home to San Fran mayor Joseph Alioto, this white marble mansion is best known for its elaborate "playroom" in the basement, which features a home theater, gym, sauna, and wet bar. $8,980,000 at Coldwell Banker.

Photo: Coldwell Banker/Coldwell Banker

CHARLESTON, SOUTH CAROLINA: Built atop a private boat dock, this South Carolina townhouse was once a degaussing station for the US Navy but was given a luxe makeover in 2010. Now, the harbor-side property features a main house, guest house, library, and even a wine room. Just hope for no hurricanes. $13,000,000 at Christies.

Photo: Christies/Christies

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA: This midcentury modern Sunset Strip abode looks like the future home of a Hollywood starlet, with sliding glass walls, a reflecting pond, and two separate guest suites all facing the pool and views of downtown LA. $5,650,000 at The Agency.

Photo: The Agency/The Agency

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