One of the questions most often posed to me is what do guys really think about women’s body types. Do we prefer a curvy or skinny? How thin is too thin? How important is chest size? Etc.
Let me first tell you that men are all different in this regard. I actually know some guys who consider Mary-Kate Olsen’s “I may have died three months ago” look sexy. Apparently they think sunken eyes and protruding bones are hot.
Despite what you may assume, we don’t expect you all to be waif-thin with gravity-defying cleavage. We do actually exist in reality and are fully aware that Victoria’s Secret models are not the norm. In fact, the body image projected to you from magazine covers and television affects women far more than men.
I can’t stand the overly skinny stereotype that some women feel is the ultimate goal. I see the typical fashion model and can’t believe someone finds that look attractive. I see a girl like Kate Bosworth and my first thought isn’t “Wow, she is hot,” it’s “Wow, she needs to eat a steak.” Or three. Frankly, I don’t want to date someone with the body of a 12-year-old boy. Obviously someone likes her look, but personally, if I wanted to see ribs with no meat on them I’d take a job bussing tables at Tony Roma’s.
For some reason, women assume men are looking for rail thin. That is really not the case. Sure we like a nice stomach on a girl but only if it’s attached to a healthy body. It is troubling to see someone like Lindsay Lohan right now. Her frame is disappearing faster than her career. OK, that’s not fair, nothing could possibly disappear that quickly.
I think most men tend to find curvy women more attractive because it’s a classically feminine look. Scarlett Johansson will always get more of a reaction than, say, Nicole Richie, because there’s something sexy about natural curves. But we do realize that women with ScarJo’s generous top half are rare. We don’t expect your body to defy the laws of physics. Mr. Newton wrote those rules down for a reason.
That’s not to say that curves for days are all we’re into. I personally think Kim Kardashian has taken it too far. Most guys are interested in a happy medium between curvy and thin.
There are two things I can say about body types that are almost universal among men.
First, proportion is the key. I don’t think it matters what you’ve got as long as it all looks like it fits. Use what you have to your advantage. Accentuate your strengths. The sexiest girl I knew growing up didn’t have a perfectly flat stomach, but what she did have fit her body type exactly. We also appreciate it when a girl tries to stay in shape by hitting the gym or running, simply because we like to see the effort. I’m sure women feel the same way about their men. Besides, being healthy is never a bad thing.
Second, confidence is the sexiest thing you can have. Whatever your body type, be comfortable with it. I know this one is hard for everybody but if you’re not comfortable in your own skin there is a good chance we won’t be comfortable with it either. There is no bigger turn-off than a girl who constantly points out her own flaws.
So don’t focus so much on what other women look like or what you think we want you to look like. Focus on making the most out of what you’ve got.
Ryan Phillips is a 28-year-old freelance journalist. He is the founder of Rumors and Rants, one of the top sports blogs on the internet. He and four friends write much longer, more incoherent posts there.
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