Pete Davidson Compared Ariana Grande’s Tan to ‘Brown Spray Paint’ & We’re Dead

Pete Davidson, Ariana Grande
Photo: Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic.

We knew he had a lot to say, but we didn’t know he had this much to say. Pete Davidson shaded Ariana Grande in his Netflix standup special, Alive From New York, and he didn’t hold back, especially when it came to the “Thank U Next” singer’s controversial tan. In the special, which premiered on Netflix on Tuesday, February 25, Davidson, 26, responded to Grande, 26, calling their relationship “insane and highly unrealistic” in an August 2019 Vogue interview.

“She has her songs and stuff and this is what I have,” he said in his standup routine. “You’re like, ‘Pete, this isn’t fair. You’re airing out dirty laundry. How could you do that? Where did she say this stuff? To her friends in the confidence of her own home?’ No, she said it on the cover of Vogue magazine.

The comedian went on to take a jab at Grande’s tan and claim that the public’s reaction would be different if he said the same things she did. “Can you imagine if I did that? My career would be over tomorrow if I spray-painted myself brown and hopped on the cover of Vogue magazine and just started shitting on my ex,” he said.

He also joked that his career would be done if he did an interview and said something like,  “Yeah, I was just fucking him because I was bored and then Fortnite came out.”

“Sometimes life is a little unfair,” he continued. “My biggest fear is that I’m gonna get shot in the back of the head by a 9-year-old with a ponytail and the last thing I’m gonna hear is ‘#canceled.’”

The Saturday Night Live cast member also speculated that Grande claiming he had “big dick energy” was her way of manipulating his reputation. “She’s a very smart person,” he said. “She did that so that every girl that sees my d—k for the rest of my life is disappointed. It’s a lifetime L.”

Davidson and Grande ended their engagement in October 2018 after a whirlwind five-month relationship. (Their breakup came a month after Grande’s ex-boyfriend, Mac Miller, died of an accidental overdose.) After his romance with the pop star, Davidson went on to date stars like Kate Beckinsale, Kaia Gerber and Margaret Qualley.

As of now, though, he’s single. And it looks like he’s ready to air his exes’ dirty laundry.