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In the infamous words of Sir-Mix-a-Lot—“..and a round thing in your face you get sprung.” Which is to say, the first new moon of spring is right around the corner, coming April 5, and it promises to bring all the shifts typically associated with a new moon. And we will totally get to that. But first, I just wanna say—sometimes, shifts and new seasons and big decisions are hard. Like, really, really down-and-dirty, didn’t-know-you-could-feel-this-terrible, HARD.
I mean, I spent the last new moon listening to sad music in a strip mall parking lot. I methodically ate my way through two containers of waffle fries and cried so hard that I was just making that heinous face where everything is all twisted up and no sound comes out. Cool, cool, cooooool. I did not feel like anyone qualified to talk about lunar trends or how to live your best Verdana-font, Pinterest-curated life. I felt like a big bag of shit.
All that’s to say, It’s super easy to romanticize new moons and commodify wellness and feministic symbols. If they can sell it at Forever 21—trust me, they will. But the honest truth is that our bodies and minds and this big-ass precious world do not fit into the confines of a well-rendered galaxy prints. Situations are complicated. People make bad choices, knowingly or not. Let’s make this new moon one without quartz and jade rollers. Those things are great, but they will not save you.
The shifts all signs may experience this new moon may not be super sexy, or even what we asked for. But in some ways, that’s even better. As much kombucha as we drink, our limiting beliefs can hold us back. Sometimes what the universe has in store is even better than our wildest imaginings. So lean into the punch, sweet signs. Cry so hard that your eyebrows knit together like a deranged caterpillar. Gross yourself out a little bit with how much you can feel things. It’s OK to be a mess. We don’t have to get it right on the first try, or even the fifth.
Challenge yourself with self-care that you’ve been neglecting. For some, that might mean committing to a nighttime moisturizer. For others, it could mean scheduling some time off, or calling it quits on a bad relationship. Only you know what you need.
I’m always telling the various signs to focus on their health, from which all of daily life stems. But girl, go to the doctor! Whatever you’ve been avoiding, it’s time to face. Maybe it’s not the doctor, but we all have sickness inside of us. Let yourself heal, even if it means ripping off the scabs and letting those suckers breath.
Stop taking the easy way out, dear Gemini. This new moon wants to bring you to the next chapter of your life, but you need to do some heavy lifting, too. Trust that you have all the answers, and don’t let fear stop you from moving forward.
I see so much brightness for you this new moon, Cancer. Maybe it’s a new flame, friend, or community. Soak up these sunshine-y vibes and let yourself take a mental vacation—or like, a physical one, if you can swing it. This new moon should be relatively smooth sailing, so enjoy the ride.
It’s easy to be reactionary. I get that. But this new moon, make a plan. How you’re going to deal with age-old family drama, friend politics, etc. If you’re prepared, you’ll spend less time cleaning up emotional messes and more time moving forward with intention. Reactions don’t solve problems—they usually just make them more life-consuming.
Dig deeper this full moon, Virgo. It’s easy to get caught up in the minutiae of daily life and to try to hit every mark of society’s Health & Productive Life Hacks! Doctors Hate This! But take time to read a book that makes you feel small and big all at the same time. Go through your childhood bedroom and remember your best friend from third grade. There are other worlds inside you. Don’t forget them.
This new moon, I want you to reflect on what’s missing. That thing that makes you think, “Yeah, I’m pretty happy, but…” Maybe it’s a lack of fulfilling friendships, or a weird sense of boredom you get whenever you don’t have a deadline or concrete plans. The answer doesn’t have to be revolutionary. It might even be “drink less coffee and take my dog for a walk in the morning.” But you won’t know unless you put the effort out to take stock of your life.
Celebrate this new moon with friends and people who make you feel gooooood, Scorpio. We know you’re independent and enjoy spending time with yourself, but people can enrich your life in new and exciting ways. Go out to dinner, or dancing. Walk in the park and drink a smoothie or eat something greasy at a strip mall. It’s up to you. But bring company.
Buy some really good shoes for yourself this new moon. My tastes tend toward the eccentric (I need cheetah print—something to make me feel ALIVE), but live your truth. The only thing that separates your sweet toes from the ground is shoes. You should feel like you’re walking on red carpet, or soft grass.
Career turmoil will reach its peak this new moon, but a breakthrough is in sight. Keep thinking and planning and imagining your purpose and work. I know how draining it can be. Resumes are like emotional/ego vampires—they suck the energy right out of you. Hang tight. Take a nap and come back to it all.
To change your life, you have to change the things you do daily. But don’t overwhelm yourself, Aquarius. This new moon, focus on changing one thing you do daily to improve your life. Things will get better. But most importantly—you’ll be stronger.
Go somewhere. Via airplane, bike, boat, car—it doesn’t matter. But this new moon is an opportunity to break out of your routine and go somewhere completely different. Stretch yourself to do something that makes you slightly uncomfortable—whether it be clubbing or a museum trip. We all change and grow. The things you used to be afraid of may fill you up now.
Let’s all howl at that new moon, sweet ones. I know I did, with a crazy tear-stained face and a super intense stomachache in that Carl’s Jr. parking lot. I felt better after. I’m sure you will, too.
Love, love, love.