Carly Spindel has inadvertedly been in the matchmaking business since she was six years old. Now, she’s the vice president of Janis Spindel Serious Matchmaking Inc. (check them out at JanisSpindelMatchMaker.com!) and has “officially” been matching couples for four years.
Being in a committed relationship is fabulous—it’s great to have someone to share the good and the bad with. Of course, the big questions in relationships can be tricky to answer. Here are some solutions to the most common “when to” questions couples so often face.
1. When Should We Go Away Together?
After it’s been established that you’re exclusive, you should plan one night away together as soon as both of your schedules permit. The sooner you go away together, the sooner you find out what someone’s really like.
You learn about your partner’s habits and what they’re like around the clock—not just on dates. Spending time away from your home, even if it’s just for a night, gives you insight into the relationship. It’s a good opportunity to learn a lot about the person you’re dating—you can see what life is like when the stress of work isn’t hanging over both of you, and there are no interruptions. Besides, a little extra romance is always an added bonus!
2. When Should We Be “Meeting The Parents?”
How soon in a relationship should the parents come into the picture? Unfortunately, there isn’t a hard and fast date—you should introduce your boyfriend or girlfriend to your parents when the time is right.
That said, if you’ve already said “I love you,” it’s fair to want to want to meet his parents and vice versa. Regardless of when you decide to do it, it should happen when you both feel ready and should be as organic and stress-free as possible.
3. When Should We Move in Together?
Moving in together is an exciting step. But, before you pack your bags and pick out your new furniture, you should confirm that both of you have the same relationship goals—do you see this as a step toward getting engaged? Is that not on your mind at all? It would be horrible to move in together and then find out that you both aren’t on the same page. Make sure you both map out your future plans and needs before shacking up.
4. When Should We Get Engaged?
Getting engaged is one of the most thrilling times in your life. It should happen when you’re absolutely sure that you want to spend the rest of your life with your significant other. Some people believe that after a year of dating, you should be ready to say “I do.” That’s not true—you should be ready for marriage when you are confident that your significant other is the person you want to be with forever. You have the rest of your life to be married, so marriage isn’t something to rush into.
Remember, there’s no specific timeline for the “when tos.” All relationships develop at a different pace. The major steps in a relationship should happen when both partners are ready. You want your partner to feel confident and excited about all relationship related decisions!