The Manzie Report: Male Grooming Dos and Don’ts

Abe

Men, we’ve come a long way since Fred Astaire and the Golden Age of Hollywood, when slicked-back hair, a clean-shaven face, spats, a top hat, and tails were in vogue; today that combination sounds more like a costume than a reality. Through the years our wardrobe has become much more casual, hair lengths went from the top of the ear down to the middle of the back, while beards and mustaches adorned our faces in countless variations. Fred was considered “elegant chic,” but we now lean towards the “casual chic” instead. This look could even be a pair of shorts, cropped blazer, sneakers and a “quirky man-hat.” Yikes. We’ve come a long way, all right…all the way to “Schleppy Chic.”

image

No matter what your personal fashion style is, good grooming is critical and the best part of any man’s look. Grooming behavior, when studied in monkeys in regards to mating, proved to be the critical element in behavioral expressions of social networks. In other words, if you want to attract a mate: scrub up, lather up, chin up, or shut up. Here are five grooming dos and don’ts to help you navigate through the road of looking good.

Creative Facial Hair Don’t

image

Here we have Dexter, who does four don’ts and one do…silly hairdo that is. #1: Don’t draw on your face. #2: Don’t pin curl your hair and use a can of Adorn to keep the curls in place. #3: Don’t accessorize your face with goggles and finally, #4: Don’t dye half of your hair with an unnatural color.

Creative Facial Hair Do

image

A well-kempt beard is always sexy.

Hair Grooming Don’t

image

Donlad Trump is guilty of two misdemeanors: #1: The Comb-over and #2: The lack of creme rinse or conditioner. Hair care is vital.

Hair Grooming Do

image

Brad Pitt sports this modified, choppy look with that winning smile. His hair is perfectly groomed with gel and a touch of spray.

Creative Fragrance Don’t

image

King Charles II of Spain was known to have such a foul body smell, the court would douse him in fragrances as they readied him for marriage. Nothing worked. Though he married twice, he never produced an heir. In other words, if you stink, wash up and don’t rely on a fragrance to make you whole.

Creative Fragrance Do

image

There’s nothing like the fresh, clean smell of the outdoors or newly washed bedding. The combination of these two smells is Gendarme, a fragrance I discovered in the early 1980s. It’s hard to find, but worth the search.

Modern Hair Cut Don’t

image

The lovely mullet. How this guy and certain lesbians go for that look is beyond me. Look in the background, that man is breching, surly from The Mullet Man.

Modern Hair Cut Do

image

Brad Pitt, short and sweet, enough said.

Other important tips include, fresh breath at all times, trimmed nose and ear hair, and my fave…pedicures.

For dos and don’t of the male grooming routine, go to imeanwhat.com.

share