Loose Lips: Ashley Olsen


“I look at Britney [Spears] and I’m surprised I didn’t end up like her…Growing up, it was almost like I was in the army.”

Ashley Olsen in Marie Claire

We’re not. Most people don’t end up marrying their back-up dancers, who have “problems with commitment” and consider a baseball cap, wife beater, and cargo shorts business casual. Most people also don’t proceed to have children with said dancers…and lose custody of the children, all the while singing songs about seeking Amy. No one wants to seek her Amy.

And about the army, what army is that? The Michelle Tanner army? Last we checked there aren’t too many military bases that cater to celebrichildren who come into millions of dollars at the ripe age of eighteen. I mean, you own DIC. Also, you wear Balenciaga mega heels, Lennon shades and have a collection of vintage Chanel purses. Cadet Olsen reporting for duty. Right.

That said, how amazing does Ashley look here? She can say anything she wants.