Look, I may have seen the 2011 Justin Bieber documentary Never Say Never in theaters (twice), and I may own the acoustic version of Bieber’s 2015 single “Love Yourself,” but this is 2019, and damnit, I’m putting my pop star-loving foot down. My heart still holds a special place for the young boy who was discovered singing on YouTube, but it will take a lot of convincing to get me to wear his middle name emblazoned on my chest, which is exactly what Justin Bieber’s new clothing line, Drew House, wants you to do.
Justin Bieber’s new streetwear collection dropped Tuesday night. The clothing line features hoodies, tees and, at least in my opinion, an oddly significeant amount of corduroy—most of which is adorned with Bieber’s middle name, Drew. If you thought it was absurd to wear clothing with a celebrity’s first name on it, try their middle name. I don’t care if it’s the name of the brand; it’s Justin Bieber’s middle name, and frankly, it’s kinda weird to me. I must be one of the only ones who think this, though, because several of the items on the site are already sold out. It hasn’t even been 24 hours! IDK, maybe Bieber is singlehandedly bringing 2018’s logomania trend into 2019.
For someone who’s 24 years old (and married), Bieber certainly appeals to teens with his new line. (Even though the clothing ranges from $48 to $148, and what kind of skater teen has that much spending money sitting around?) I guess that’s what he’s always been good at, but all I can picture when I look at the Drew House website is a hoard of 14-year-old boys blocking the street when I’m running late for work. Like, it instantly makes me feel like a middle-aged angry person or the villains in Scooby Doo who always say, “If it weren’t for you meddling kids…”
Maybe the fact that this clothing line makes me feel old is why I’m so resistant to it. I guess I’ll just have to buy one of the shirts with Justin Bieber’s middle name on the front and see how I feel. It’s called personal growth, OK?