Sometimes, at the end of a long day, you might be craving a physical release, but know that you and your partner are probably too burned out to motivate yourselves to turn the heat up for anything more than a basic quickie. No problem, people—it actually is possible to access serious pleasure from just a few little tips and tweaks. Seriously—the eight tips below require minimal effort, and net major results.
Leave the Bedroom
One of the easiest ways to heat things up in the bedroom is to get OUT of it. “Take your partner out of their comfort zone and really explore the rest of your surroundings,” says Taylor Henry, a sexual health expert. “Changing the environment from what you’re both normally used to helps bring spontaneity and excitement into the mix—which can be a huge turn-on. Try your kitchen, bathroom, car or even an empty room in a busy house.”
Turn on Some Porn
You’ve heard it before, but we’re guessing you may have ignored the tip—porn is an easy, super-fast way to get you both in the mood, says Alexis Thomas, owner of Taboo Tabou, a pleasure-positive women’s boutique. “We’re not talking Pornhub; we’re talking good, sexy, and female-driven porn. One of the best outlets for this is Erika Lust’s X Confessions. Literally, five minutes with her and you’ll find yourself ready to go.”
Use Music to Get in the Mood
Music that energizes you, relaxes you, or puts you in a romantic mood can elevate a basic weeknight romp to something more special. “Think back to all those times in your life that a song made you feel warm and fuzzy and compile those into a Spotify playlist to set the perfect mood,” says Thomas.
Draw Out Oral Sex
If you’re used to going down on your partner just long enough to get them ready for sex, commit to at least 15 minutes of you pleasuring them as soon as they walk in the door, suggests Kim Anami, a holistic sex and relationship expert. “Most people use this as cursory foreplay, rather than a main course. Extended oral sex is awesome.”
Play with Voyeurism
After getting out of the shower but before going to bed, slip on something you feel confident in and make sure your partner sees. “After realizing they’re admiring your curves, lay back in bed and bring out your favorite toy as if no one is there and give your partner the tease of a lifetime. That’ll drive them crazy,” says Henry.
Serve Each Other—Literally
There’s no better way to please your partner than by offering to take care of his or her needs, says founder and CEO of Cupidspulse.com, Lori Bizzoco. “Don’t worry about cooking them a fancy dinner or planning an elaborate date night. Easy last-minute gestures like sexy compliments, massage, and telling your partner to relax and that you’ll take care of their every wish can be a complete turn-on for the both of you.”
Grab the Toys
Again—you’ve heard this one before, but it bears repeating! Don’t discount that quick-and-easy value of sex toys in the bedroom. Thomas suggests to start by using a vibrator as a body massager and then, when you’re ready to go, apply it to every part of your body that feels good. “Want to really make it easy? Grab something like a vibrating wand that has a handle, so you can be as direct as possible.”
Tie ‘Em Up
If you’ve never done this before, it’s a surefire way to get both your pulses pumping. “Maybe grab a man’s tie or two scarves and tie them up to the bedpost or edges of a bed,” says Thomas. Tying up your partner is one of the easiest, low-key ways to make things feel fresh, new, and hot again, because it’s not something you do every day or week.”