Before I started on the sex education path, I would often do appearances in adult stores, signing DVDs and taking pictures with fans. As more upscale, boutique sex stores began to emerge, people became more comfortable talking about toys, and inevitably I was asked for product recommendations. Let’s face it, I’ve definitely done a lot of research, so I began sharing my knowledge with curious customers. Questions ranged from, “Any advice on buying my first vibrator?” to, “Which toys are a good warm-up for anal sex?” and even, “I’d like to get my husband a masturbator, but I don’t know how to pick one!”
Keep in mind that there are tons of toys out there, which means there’s one (or many!) that will work for every type of person. If you’re new to sex toys—or even if you aren’t—remember that you shouldn’t always opt for what’s cheap, since most of the time, you’ll get exactly what you pay for. It may be a stretch to spend $100-$200 on a vibrator, but in the long run, it’s SO worth it to know exactly what materials were used in the making of the product, since this is something that’s going to be inside you. Also, most companies in the luxury category often have warranties or replacement guarantees, which is a plus.
In terms of safety, always choose a toy with a flared base, so you can get it out. Avoid items with strings that could come loose (and get stuck inside you) and, please, no sharp edges! Use separate toys for vaginal and anal use, and always clean them after each session. (Foam N Fresh is a great antibacterial cleanser that’s safe for all toys, no matter the material.)
Now that we have the basics out of the way, I put together my top 10 list of sex toys. Keep in mind, this list changes fairly often, and I’m not paid by any of these brands (although I may have been given free samples of product at one time or another). In no particular order, here are 10 toys I love right now, for people of all genders and sexualities.
This is a very small yet VERY powerful vibe that you can wear as jewelry. Seriously. Only those who know will know. This is currently my go-to, and it never fails me.
The Vesper by Crave, $69; at Crave
This is the first stroker toy for trans men, was created by Buck Angel himself, someone who is a huge inspiration to me, and a hell of a role model for the trans community.
The Buck-OFF, $30; at Perfect Fit
I may be biased because I have one (actually, three) of these customizable masturbators created in my own vaginal likeness, but this really is the number-one male masturbator.
Fleshlight Girls, from $80; at Fleshlight
My latest fascination, these anal plugs feature different sizes to accommodate your every need. Try the rimming vibe. You’re welcome!
Rimming Plug, $150; at B Vibe
The Pocket Rabbit
This has an excellent feel, with strong, quiet vibrations. It’s jeweled very tastefully, and fits perfectly in your hand.
The Pocket Rabbit Crystalized Limited Edition, $180; at The Rabbit Company
This vibrator is small, discreet, and holds a lengthy charge. It's great for clitoral stimulation, and is affordable, but not cheap.
Luxe Compact Vibe, $55; at NS Novelties
Gone are the days of wand massagers with cords that get tangled everywhere. This one has solid, strong vibes, and are great for experimenting everywhere, on all body types.
Rechargeable Bodywand, $26; at Bodywand
Once I got past the name, (and honestly, I had to try VERY hard) the orgasms came easily with this suction-style stimulator that goes directly onto the user’s clit. Many people polled reported orgasms in under a minute. Yep—ONE MINUTE.
Womanizer, $130; at Buy Womanizer
Metal Worx Luv Plug
This perfectly-sized metal butt plug has a handle that’s easy to grasp. Excellent for those who are into sensation play, as you can use them cold, room temperature, or warm.
Metal Worx Luv Plug, $20; at Amazon
This prostate massager (a.k.a. male G-spot stimulator) has an amazing design: It's perfectly shaped at the head for a more direct prostate massage, with not only a handle at the other end, but also a tab that rubs directly on the perineum.
Helix Classic, $50; at Aneros