Whether you’re single, in a relationship or constantly getting woken up by 2 a.m. texts from your latest hookup, I have a funny feeling you could use a little variety in your sex life. No, I’m not condoning cheating—I’m just talking about throwing in a few new moves! A few dominant sex positions, to be exact, and the more amped-up, the better. If propping up a leg here and pulling some hair there makes things that much more intense, think of how great the sex you’re having could be with a little extra edge.
If you don’t see yourself as a secret dominatrix, fear not. Dominant sex positions sound a lot more intimidating than they are. Hear me out! Maybe it’s because we often associate the word “dominant” with aggressive personalities, or perhaps it’s because we sometimes imagine semi-threatening, Red-Room-of-Pain-type vibes. Either way, forget those tropes and replace them with the idea that dominance can be fun. Very fun. And sexy as hell, too.
If you do see yourself as a Dom in the bedroom, trying out some dominant sex positions will put you in control and leave you ~cumming~ out of every sexual encounter feeling more confident than ever before. On the reverse, if you’re dying for your partner to dominate you, discovering dominant sex positions will help you communicate to them what you’re cool with, so you can both enjoy. Either way, it pays to know a little something-something about dominant moves.
With that, read on for 10 dominant sex positions that will make you rethink your missionary ways. And trust me, the pleasure is all mine.
1. Upside Down Doggy Style
Craving ultra-deep penetration? This extra-dominant take on doggy style requires the penetrating partner to enter from above. Now, it will no doubt require a little ~flexibility~ from the receiving partner—given they’re upside down and all— but if they can make it work, expect a sweet release for both parties.
Love this position but want to take charge with toys? Have the submissive partner get in formation and make them feel better than ever before with the new Le Wand Contour Stainless Steel Wand. It can be heated or cooled for temperature play, and the weight of the wand itself is enough to make your partner moan.
2. Crouching Downstroke
Another great way to take control of your sex life is with this squatting cowgirl position. Squatting (as opposed to kneeling) over your partner puts you at a better angle to bounce around, while also controlling the depth. Just make sure to perform this sexy act on something super sturdy, because it’d probably ruin the mood if the table collapsed beneath you.
3. Up Against the Wall
If you and your partner are feeling especially athletic, consider this up-against-the-wall move. By lifting your partner up off the ground, you (or your partner—whoever’s doing the lifting) are put in total control. For the most orgasmic results—and to not feel exhausted after, real talk—use a wall as leverage. Pressing your partner against the wall while thrusting up into them will make for a Hollywood sex scene IRL.
(Psst: If you’re not super confident in your lifting abilities but want to test drive this move, consider an over-the-door sex swing, like the UTIMI Sex Swing, to help support your partner’s weight.)
4. Bent and Bound
Remember trust falls back in elementary school? Consider this the kinkier, more grown-up version. Your partner will have to put total trust into you as you go at it with their wrists bound from behind. To heat things up a notch, add a blindfold, like the Slip Silk Sleep Mask, into the mix. Just make sure that you don’t accidentally let go as you release, or this position could go from dominant to destructive real quick.
5. The Back Bend
If your partner is gymnast-level flexible, allow me to introduce you to a mind-blowing move guaranteed to spice up your sex life. Standing tall, have your partner bend into a backbend as you grip their legs. Once they’re stable and in place, use their thighs as leverage to plummet deep into their bits for pleasure like never before. As you take control of the movement your partner will explode, thanks to every muscle in their body being flexed in an attempt to stay upright in their backbend. Sex that doubles as a workout sesh? This is what I’d call a win-win, folks.
6. Sitting Cowgirl
Look, sometimes letting your partner penetrate you just doesn’t get the job done. If you find it difficult to get off from doggy style and updated missionary positions, it’s time to turn your attention to this spicy position. Simply lay your partner down and hop on for a wild ride. Unlike crouching downstroke, sitting cowgirl is more about back-and-forth movement that ensures penetration and clitoral stimulation are both achieved. Of course, since you’re on your feet, you can always bounce up and down for a hybrid position that lets you enjoy from all angles.
7. Bolstered Beauty
With this bolstered move you can let your babe lay down and relax as you make their fantasies come true. Simply place a bolster pillow under their pelvis as you enter from behind—not all dominant sex positions are ultra-complicated, folks! The added pressure from the front will help ensure you hit the sweet spot.
8. Standing Doggy Style
Let’s be clear: You can never go wrong with a doggy style move any sort. It’s a classic that’s pretty much at the forefront of domineering sex positions. To amp it up a notch from the typical kneeling format, stand above your partner for extra angle play. While you’re at it, grab their shoulders or hair, or reach around for a little second-base action.
9. Divide and Conquer
Ready to be dominating (or dominated) AF? The divide-and-conquer pose has you kneeling above your partner as you spread their legs and control the speed and angle of penetration. This also gives them to option to engage in some clit play. It’s safe to say this is one position that’s as delightful to do as it is to watch. If your partner prefers toys to manual clitoral stimulation, consider adding the Lelo Sona Cruise Black to your sex toy arsenal. It features eight pleasure settings to mimic oral anytime, anywhere.
10. Low Doggy Style
Look, there’s something so incredibly sexy about a little hair-pull action. So, if you’re looking to go out with a dominating bang, prop your babe up on a pillow, penetrate them from behind, and grab a full handful of hair in the process. Just a few strands hurts more than a fistful, so be generous with your grip! Tugging at the nape of their neck will create a pleasantly tense sensation that only heightens your partner’s overall pleasure.
Oh, and one last thing. Remember: Whenever dominance is the goal, trust should always be the basis. After all, just because you want to dominate someone (or be dominated by someone) doesn’t mean you want pain or fear to play a role—unless that’s your thing, in which case, you do you. As a general rule of thumb, it’s a good idea to have a safe word in any sort of dominating sexual experience so that neither party gets pushed past their limits. It may seem trivial when you’re just starting out, but if you decide to veer past these positions into heavier BDSM, it can be beneficial to have a safe word so that things don’t get out of hand. With that, enjoy!