Dating Duds? Get Tips From An Upscale Matchmaker

Upscale matchmaker Janis Spindel. Image courtesy of Janis Spindel Serious Matchmaking

My mom, Janis Spindel, is unlike any other matchmaker. She only takes on men as clients. When she first started her business, Janis Spindel Serious Matchmaking, Inc., both men and women had the opportunity to become her clients. As she became more successful, she saw that women were too difficult to work with they would call her at all hours of the day. Instead of being their love guru, she found herself playing the role of their psychiatrist. So, she did what any sane person would do. She passed up the fairer sex and decided to only take on men who require less attention and dont obsess as much as clients. Here’s how the setup works:

The Set Up Process
Even though my mom is a matchmaker, she could double as a detective. Before she agrees to take a man on as a client, she does a lot of background work. She goes on a simulated date with the prospective client.

The point of a simulated date is to see what hes really like. She pays attention to his manners and how he treats her. Was he late and rude? Was he nice to the waitstaff? Was he polite and respectful? Would he make a good husband? After all, she has to make sure the men are indeed a good catch before she sets them up with the women in her database.

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What A Matchmaker Looks For
Janis won’t take any joe-schmo off the street as a client. My mom only deals with successful, upscale, attractive, well-educated men and women basically an automatic filter of sorts. She isnt an escort service, so she only sets up men and women who are commitment-minded and want to get married.

If someone comes to her looking for a booty call, she politely tells them to get lost. (Its happened more than a few times.) The same goes for gold diggers.

The Major Turnoffs For Men
Janis says that men look for the 4Bs: Beauty, Brains, Body, and Balance.

Lets face it, men are visual. They fall in love through their eyes. So, they want to date a woman who takes care of herself. Men are turned off by facial or leg hair. Its just not sexy. Men enjoy dating a woman with a nice smile, good skin, and pretty eyes. They appreciate a woman who takes pleasure in her appearance. She doesnt have to be a beauty queen, but a blow dry and a little lipstick can do wonders for just about anyone.

Men enjoy being challenged. They want to date a woman whos capable of having an intelligent conversation. You dont have to be a genius to find a man, but you have to be smart. Successful men enjoy dating women who can contribute to a conversation. They like talking about their interests with the person they choose to date.

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A girl who’s hot and works too? Love it. Photo:

As I said before, men are visual. Theyre attracted to women who lead a healthy lifestyle. This doesnt mean you have to be rail thin, but you should exercise more than once a year. Men appreciate a woman who takes good care of her body. Remember, effort is attractive.

Men want the whole package. Someone whos beautiful, smart, funny, in shape, and grounded is a turn on. They need a well-rounded woman to balance them out. At the end of the day, men desire a woman whos calm, cool, and confident.

So, if youre looking for the love of your life and you cant find him or her, perhaps it’s time to call a matchmaker!

What do you think of the matchmaking tips above? Let us know in the comments!

Carly Spindel is a writer and hopeless romantic. She is a world traveler who has lived in Paris and London. She resides in New York and is always on the go. She can usually be found at her favorite caf enjoying chocolate mousse while people watching, which is one of her favorite hobbies. Carly spends the rest of her time focusing on her five dearest past times: travelling, learning about different cultures, shopping, reading, and of course looking for Mr. Right.

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