Correct me if I’m wrong, but engaging in a relationship through a telephone line just isn’t the ideal. And the four-times-a-year visits across the country to your significant other in Texas? Not going to cut it. As unappealing as long distance relationships can sound, people around the world still somehow make them work. So why do some people seem to get along fine when their lover is thousands of miles away, while others can’t last a week? Being in an LDR isn’t necessarily right or wrong, it just takes a certain kind of person.
Here are some ways to foresee if your LDR is doomed before it even starts.
You’re a sex fiend:
Well, isn’t this one just obvious? If you’re one of those people who can’t seem to keep their pants on, you’re not going to last a week. Yes technology has given us wonderful new options in fornication that can be practiced from afar (aka phone sex and sexting), but even this is unlikely to satisfy your sexual cravings for very long.
You can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel:
For a LDR to typically work, you and your partner need to know that the distance isn’t forever, or indefinite. If you haven’t made the commitment to each other to reunite and be in the same location in the future, then it’s likely to wear on both of you, not to mention wear down your bank account with those plane tickets.
You’re a poor communicator:
So you’re across the country from your significant other and you miss them so much it hurts. But you hate talking on the phone, and you’re not great at composing your emotions and thoughts into an email coherently. So what the hell are you going to do? Have a relationship in silence?!? No! Honestly, you should just break up. If you’re really committed to making it work, practice becoming a better communicator–it’s a good life skill. Trust us.
You’ve cheated in the past:
You gave into temptation once, so who’s to say you won’t do it again? We’d like to think the “once a cheater, always a cheater” concept is false, but even if you’ve changed your ways, your bf or gf may have trouble trusting from afar. On the contrary, if your significant other once cheated, and you are now miles apart, do you think you’ll be able to sleep at night knowing your lover is out having a drink on the town with “friends?” Jealousy is the easiest way to bring down a relationship, so give it up, or get out now.
You’re not willing to make sacrifices:
Although being apart may seem like less of a time commitment, it’s almost more inconvenient and time-consuming having to always plan when exactly you’ll be able to talk to the other person. As much as you are “together” as a couple, you are very much leading separate lives in separate places with separate people, so coordinating schedules may not come easily. You must be willing to sacrifice some of the things you want to do on a daily basis to make room for this person, or someone is going to get hurt.
You love to snuggle:
We hate to be cruel but, with your lover being so far away, you’re not going to be the big spoon, or the little spoon any time in the near future. Time to buy a body pillow.