5 Lies We All Tell Ourselves After A Breakup

Bo Sellers, YourTango
142018854 5 Lies We All Tell Ourselves After A Breakup

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At the age of six, I fell madly in love with a boy in my class who I knew preferred brunettes. Although we shared a mutual love for stealing kisses under the slide, I should’ve known the relationship was doomed from the start. I suffered my first heartbreak on a sunny day during snack time, but I learned a very valuable lesson during my emotional recovery — sometimes love just ain’t enough.

This lesson still translates in my adult relationships. Whether I’m the one doing the breaking-up, or the one left crying in a Chipotle wondering what I’m doing with my life, the end of relationships still leave me feeling lost and confused. So much so, I’m willing to grasp to any fringe of hope connected to the past. But I’m here to tell ya, it’s best to let go and move on, sistah! It’s time to break ourselves of these five lies mentally repeated after breakups.

1. “We can fix it.” This is the most deceiving lie because it can lead to over-analyzing the broken pieces. Was it just a chip? Completely shattered?  Or perhaps a clean break that just needs a little TLC? But the truth is, it’s still broken. If it wasn’t broken to begin with, you wouldn’t have to convince yourself it’s fixable.

2. “Things weren’t as bad as I thought they were.” He likes chocolate, you prefer vanilla. You love listening to music and he can’t name his favorite song. Your love language is through physical touch, his is through acts of service. Yes, opposites can attract, but that doesn’t mean they provide the foundation for a lasting relationship. Know your deal-breakers. Twenty years from now, do you really want to still be arguing over milkshake flavors while he yells at you to turn the music off because the lyrics are too sad?

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