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Pre-marital counseling is becoming more and more widespread among modern-day couples to be — and it’s probably one of the best “trends” we’ve seen in the marriage sphere in quite some time. With that being said, if you and your partner are not able to get to an actual counselor before tying the not, reading some of the best books for engaged couples before your big day is a great alternative.
They say the first year of marriage is the hardest, and while I can’t confirm that this is true (still single, y’all), I have had plenty of married friends my age affirm this very idea. Working with your fiancé ahead of your wedding day is a good way to build a solid framework, and to communicate and work through expectations, individual needs, and healthy communication habits so that there aren’t any radical surprises when the post-wedding dust settles.
These books are written by a wide array of marriage and family therapists, psychologists, economists, love coaches, and basically, people who have some wisdom about lasting love and strong marriages. So whether it be to budget or time constraints (um, planning a wedding is pretty time-consuming) if you can’t meet with a therapist IRL, reading advice from these relationships pros is a good entry-level way to creating a strong foundation before tying the knot. From financial compromises, personal love languages and how to fight the right way, these helpful books will strengthen your bond before say I do.
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1. The Five Love Languages
This classic book is predicated on the idea that each person has one of a few different “love languages” that make them feel loved. Whether it’s quality time or gifts of love, Gary Champman’s compelling account of how different people express and receive love is low-key ground breaking.
This insightful book details John Gottman’s study of couples over the years, allowing him to pinpoint certain habits and traits responsible for making or breaking a relationship.
3. Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts
Authors Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott have filled this book to the brim with bond-enhancing workbooks and exercises designed to strengthen your partnership before you say I do.