Kim Kardashian has, hands down, the most iconic “ugly cry” face of all time. The scrunched-faced, open-mouthed wail is so famous, there’s even an iPhone case for its biggest fans. That said, her recovery time is pretty impressive—who else do you know who goes from petulant and tear-stained to cool and collected within seconds?
Kim, ever the generous type (and, we have to say, the first to poke fun at herself), bestowed the secrets to her ugly-cry bounce-back game on her app last night, just in time for Valentine’s Day. “Everyone knows I’m the queen of the ugly cry,” she said. Indeed, Kim, we do.
The not-so-quick fix for all your ugly cry needs is a lineup of 10 products, starting with the totally necessary waterproof mascara (her pick is L’Oreal Voluminous Carbon Black Waterproof Mascara) and including the maaaaybe-not-so-much SK-II Signs Eye Mask, which will run you $115 for 14 sheets. Then there’s cooling eye drops by Rohto, the rich, redness-diminishing Chantecaille Rose de Mai Cream, and, naturally, Clé de Peau Beaté Concealer.
So there you go; cry all you want—it’ll only cost you, like, $600.