Wherein the Times Writes the Most Boring Fashion Piece Ever

I was a journalism student in college and I tend towards the left, so obviously I have nothing but love for the grey lady. I’m especially a sucker for the Styles section those weird Modern Love columns get me every time, the Wedding announcements with Harvard MBAs and girls from the Main Line are equal parts ridiculous and amazing and Cintra Wilson’s Critical Shopper pieces are artful and hilarious. I’m also a major fan of those photo pieces that both we and other sites create, featuring one stylish person’s looks for a week, month etc.

So it’s with confusion that I present the most boring fashion article ever written, found in Sunday’s New York Times.

Amanda Hearst is a gorgeous 27 year old who works for Hearst and whose name is no coincidence. I’m sure her closet is deadly and she has access to designer clothing on a whim, which is why it pains me to see a feature on her style written out in the most banal way possible, without pictures mind you.

Exhibit A: Friday, March 4
“I woke up and threw on a Christian Dior lace top with leather Vena Cava shorts, Wolford tights and Prada booties. As I was pulling on my boots, the shirt ripped on the sleeves hem! I tried to see if I could get away with the rip, but finally decided that I couldnt. So I kept the booties and tights and put on a Catherine Malandrino dress with an Herms belt and a black, leather ruffled YSL purse. The belt was a gift from my ex-boyfriend and is probably the best gift I have ever received, period.”

Exhibit B: Sunday, March 6
“Rebecca Beeson leggings, my boyfriends JDC striped top and a Bodkin gray knit sweater. Because of the rain, I threw on a Patagonia puffer and Finn wore his red parka by Canine Styles.”

Exhibit C: Monday, March 7
“Im a big fan of J. Crew. I usually buy outfits directly off the mannequins. The styling is just so good! So while I normally wouldnt have given this blue-and-white checked Oxford shirt a second glance, when I saw it with a camel colored cardigan and green shorts, I bought the whole ensemble. I wore the blouse with a brown Ralph Lauren suede skirt, DKNY stockings and black Ralph Lauren knee-high boots.”

I mean, did they run out of photographers? I’m sure these looks were stellar. I love J.Crew too! This is just ridiculous though.