By now, it seems ABC has all but sky-written the fact that reality star and former Olympian Bruce Jenner is set to sit down with Diane Sawyer tonight for a very special two-hour edition of “20/20,” during which the 65-year-old will presumably reveal the news that he’s transitioning to become a woman.
We say good for Bruce—it takes a lot of guts for someone so enmeshed in tabloid culture to do what he’s doing—but, that said, we do feel two full hours is a teeny tiny bit egregious. Especially since we’re betting various members of the Jenner-Kardashan clan will be trotted out to offer generic sound bites about how much they’re prepared to stick by their patriarch, thus making a potential watershed moment equally about them.
Technically, you can probably tune in during the last five minutes to get any real revelations, but if you’re not interested, here are 15 things you can do instead of watching Bruce’s two-hour special.
1. Revisit N’Sync‘s epic 2000 “Bye Bye Bye” performance from Madison Square Garden 16 times.
2. Watch the most recent episode of “Mad Men”—then spend an hour Googling recaps.
3. Bake Julia Child’s famous cheese souffle—twice.
4. Read a 291-page book (Learn how here.)
5. Watch this GIF on loop 7,200 times:
6. Box-dye your hair at home, regret it, and spend 90 minutes begging every salon in town for the first appointment they have on Saturday.
7. Fly from New York City to Charlotte, NC, just because.
8. Listen to the first three episodes of “Serial.” Hey, better late than never.
9. Watch Jenner’s 1976 Wheaties commercial 400 times.
10. Or watch the “Shake it Off” video 30 times
11. Watch the puppets from “Sesame Street” spoof “Sons of Anarchy” 22 times. It’s funny.
12. Watch the 10 most ridiculous dance scenes from “Beverly Hills, 90210″—6.66 times. (here they all are.)
13. Take Buzzfeed’s “What Should You Have for Brunch?” quiz 300 times until you get something you actually like.
14. Try to teach yourself the first half of Beyoncé’s “Single Ladies” dance.
15. Actually watch paint dry—when applied at room temperature, the majority of latex paint will be dry set-to-touch within one hour.
16. Apply Crying Kim Kardashian nail decals to all 10 nails—and the nails of 10 friends.