Now, we all know that we don’t really dress for men, or even for ourselves. The fact of the matter is, we dress for other women. The sky-high heels we throw on are our way of being taller than our female counterparts, and proving to them that we can take more than they can. Not too many men really notice if we’re wearing the this-season Charlotte Ronson dress, either. But sometimes, just sometimes, it’s nice to know what men think of what we wear; we do date them, after all, and tell them when they’ve been wearing the same sweatpants three days in a row. So, after much study, here are the trends that make men run in the other direction, and the ones that he hopes you’ll wear three days in a row.
Hates: Most of what Lady Gaga wears
Accentuated shoulders and alien heels don’t exactly make men feel warm and fuzzy, in fact, they might feel like they’re dating the alien from Predator.
Loves: Anything that looks like it came from his closet
Wearing a mens shirt or an old band shirt might make him think of you in the morning, and put a big grin on his face.
Hates: Leggings as pants
Although Lohan still wears them, and leggings are super easy to throw on when it gets cold, I’ve never heard of one man who likes the thick child-like “pants” girls pair with jean skirts and dresses…or with nothing at all. You’re not at a ski lodge, ladies.
Loves: Stockings
Chances are, the women your guy idolized growing up were of the pin-up persuasion, and they always rocked sheer stockings. They come in a multitude of colors and textures and make you feel much sexier than leggings will…hey, they never did Betty Paige wrong.
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Hates: Uggs
We have to be honest, we sort of hate them too, but plenty of girls still wear them everywhere. They might be way overplayed in our eyes, but men just find them ugly.
Loves: Heels
They’re not called *$#% Me Pumps for nothing, but there is a place to draw the line. Too much platform might channel Cherry the Stripper, and too little (a kitten heel, if you will), will remind him of Pam from The Office before she got a better stylist.
Hates: High-waisted skirts
Maybe they remind him of his least-favorite principal from Catholic School, or maybe he hated that Maggie Gyllenhaal flick Secretary, but the high waist makes him want to run home to his mama.
Loves: Mini-skirts
Mini-skirts, while not appropriate for the workplace, are fun if paired with the aforementioned sheer stockings.
Hates: Bug-eyed sunglasses
Unless they have an unusual fetish for the movie The Fly (such a creepy film), having a serious conversation with you while seeing his entire reflection is your glasses is kind of a turn-off.
Loves: Seeing your eyes
Eye contact makes up most of communication, especially when you’re, um, trying to get somewhere with someone. There’s that spark, the batting of eyelashes, etc…all of which cannot happen if you look like a beetle. That being said, they also like natural-looking eyes. Don’t pile on the fake lashes and black liner to make up for the fact that you left your Pradas at home.
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