Real Estate Porn: Bernie Madoff’s Former NYC Digs and Zaha Hadid’s Miami Penthouse

Leah Bourne
Real Estate Porn: Bernie Madoff’s Former NYC Digs and Zaha Hadid’s Miami Penthouse
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Whether or not you’re a captain of industry, few pleasures in life are as uncomplicated as clicking through impossibly luxe (and ridiculously expensive) real estate listings.
This week, we are lusting after the former apartment of Ponzi-schemer Bernie Madoff—which has been updated into a modern New York City oasis.
We’re also wishing we could lay our head in super star architect Zaha Hadid’s Miami pads (yes plural, she owns two apartments that are right next door to each other). Amazing ocean views? Check.
Which new listings have you drooling this week? Tell us in the comments below!

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SANTA YNEZ, CALIFORNIA: This massive modernist mansion sits on a hilltop on 218 prime acres in California (just think of the views). So what does the house come with? Five bedrooms, five bathrooms, a separate guest suite, a two-bedroom cottage, a ranch manager's house, an eight-stall horse barn, and extensive equestrian facilities. $15,900,000 at Central Coast Landmark Properties

NEW YORK, NEW YORK: In 2010, less than a year after Bernie Madoff, the mastermind of a Ponzi scheme considered to be the largest financial fraud in this country's history, was sentenced to 150 years in federal prison, the United States sold off his longtime penthouse on Manhattan's Upper East Side for $8 million. The pad then got a makeover and is now back on the market for more than twice the price. The 4,000 square foot apartment includes 11-foot ceilings, a library, chef's kitchen, and a wraparound terrace. $17,250,000 at Dolly Lenz.

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA: Actor and funny man Justin Long is selling his Hollywood Hills pad. The 3,388 square foot home includes one of the coolest hand hewn doors we have ever seen, along with vaulted ceilings, a private enclosed front courtyard, multiple fireplaces, and even fruit trees on the lawn. Interesting fact: The home was once owned by Blair Underwood. $2,100,000 at Sotheby's International Realty.

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA: Salma Hayek purchased this home back in 1996, and has since gone on to marry one of the richest men in the world. Well, now is your chance to rent Hayak's LA starter home. The 2,900-square-foot one-story ranch house sits in the sought-after Outpost Estates neighborhood where "actors Matthew Perry, Michael C. Hall and Ryan Reynolds" all live. $9,500 per month at Sotheby's International Realty

MOSCOW, RUSSIA: This party pad on the outskirts of Moscow boasts an indoor swimming pool, a kitchen with "food elevator" (whatever that means), a home cinema, a billiard room, a detached spa building with a gym, massage room, a steam shower, a guard house, and even a its own car wash. If you are a billionaire bachelor, this is essentially the perfect home. $38,000,000 at Sotheby's International Realty

MIAMI, FLORIDA: Super star Iraqi-born British architect Zaha Hadid has listed two units at Miami Beach's W South Beach—a two-bedroom and a studio. Word is that she is looking to upgrade. Considering these apartments both boast incredible beach view, we would be happy to settle for Hadid's second best. $5,750,000 at Howard Chase Real Estate

CORNISH, NEW HAMPSHIRE: If you are looking for that picturesque farm house, Bartlett Farm is it. This 160-acre historic farm has been in the same family for "generations," and includes 1826 brick Cape, a swimming pond, and a 200-tap sugar maple orchard. This is as idyllic as it gets. $899,000 at Sotheby's International Realty

NEWPORT, CALIFORNIA: Kobe Bryant is unloading his giant California mega-mansion that includes four-bedrooms, a hair salon, a home theater, and a 850-foot gym. This is a basketball star's home so naturally there is also a shark tank. And don't worry about Bryant, he has a larger home nearby, so he won't exactly be homeless. $8,599,000 via Real Estalker

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