Today marks Miley Cyrus‘ 21st birthday, and it’s amazing to think that she’s basically been famous for more than half of her life at this point. From the Disney-fied world of “Hannah Montana” to the decidedly un-family-friendly twerk-happy scenes from her “We Can’t Stop” video, Miley’s worked hard to become a superstar, and she should celebrate accordingly.
Or not. Because as she mentioned just last week, she wants us to believe that she’s totally lame and never goes out (um, okay.) “When I’m home, I don’t really leave my house,” she told BBC radio. “I tell people who think I’m really cool, ‘by the way I’m super lame.’ What you read about me, it sounds like all I do is club and go and party with Terry Richardson, but really I’m like the lamest. I never leave my house because I’m a complete hermit.”
Which we believe … not at all. But if you’re really as “super-lame” as you say Miley, we’ve got a laundry list of GIFs—21 actually!—that suggest how you celebrate your birthday.
1. Dig up your old “Hannah Montana” wigs (and cry).
2. Open up your laptop and read all the negative comments people write whenever StyleCaster posts anything about you on Facebook. Anything.
3. Catch up on old episode of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” (we know you’re a fan).
4. Enjoy some special “me” time.
5. Pump some iron. Or just lick it. Whatever.
6. Hang out in bed all day.
7. Try out some new makeup looks.
8. Practice your pretty crying. (You’re seriously really good at this. Give lessons, please?)
9. Get rid of unwanted facial hair.
10. Find that retainer you lost when you were 15, and furiously try to fit it back in your mouth.
11. Dole out sassy self-affirmations.
12. Work on getting that tongue problem under control.
13. Break out the ol’ wind machine and turn your breakfast nook into a glamorous wind cave.
14. Invite a friend over to shower you in Party City confetti or potpourri. Your choice!
16. Attempt to fashion a star-gazing device out of your delicately-placed heart-shaped hands. Give up, and pull out the telescope your dad Billy Ray gave you for Christmas.
17. Be your own private dancer.
18. Fire off an angry missive to the “Hannah Montana” stylist responsible for the above extensions.
19. Catalog your crop tops via an elaborate Dewey Decimal-like wardrobing system.
20. Take up crimping again. Remember why you gave it up the last time. Stop crimping.
21. Remember that you’re just Miley, y’all and you can do whatever you want for your birthday. And oh, whoops, also, you’ve actually taken over MTV to celebrate your 21st and should probably get to work.