You know that moment when you think you know someone and then you find out that they’re running a secret Instagram account with the sole purpose of reviewing onion rings? No? Well, now you do. Lorde is that someone.
The 20-year-old pop sensation (and covert onion ring enthusiast) was recently exposed for her hush-hush Insta behavior by her fans, and we’re still shook. Here’s what we know so far. Two days ago, a 17-year-old fan tipped off News Hub, a New Zealand news outlet, about Lorde potentially running an onion ring Instagram. When the outlet checked it out, they found a slew of evidence incriminating the “Green Light” singer as a secret onion rings stan. (Sorry, Lorde. You’re busted.)
The first piece of evidence was that the Instagram, @Onionringsworldwide, only had 24 followers and followed no one in return. (Almost like they didn’t want attention.) Among its followers were—yup, you guessed it—Lorde. Along with the New Zealand-raised singer, the account was also followed by Lorde’s friends and music associates, Justin Warren, Jimmy Mac, and Maddy Budd. (Believe us yet?)
Now we present you with evidence B: the locations. For the caption of each picture, the account holder (*cough* Lorde *cough*) wrote the restaurant the onion ring came from, the city of the restaurant, and a review of the ring’s onion ringy qualities.
Because of the location stamps, fans were able to match a timeline of when the onion rings were eaten and where Lorde was at that time. For one onion ring, the account said it was eaten on a plane from Tennessee to New York. Who was in Tennessee recently to perform at the Bonarroo Music Festival and has an apartment in New York? You got it, Lorde. The picture was also posted on New Zealand time, which we know Lorde is familiar with.
The three other onion rings (hey, running an onion ring review Instagram is a lot of upkeep) were bought in Syndey (where Lorde performed two shows at the time of the onion ring consumption), New York, and Hatfield, a city north of London where Lorde was also at to perform at Radio 1’s Big Weekend. (The Sydney onion ring was consumed at a hotel only 10 minutes from the venue Lorde sang at.)
Here’s where things get even more ~spooky~. Enter evidence C: the language. With songs like “Royals” (which we think is a banger, but TBH, we don’t know what the hell she’s singing about), Lorde is no stranger to big vocabulary. So when one of the reviews included the word, “ceremoniously,” we knew we had a wordssmith on our hands (AKA Lorde.)
Need more? The account also spelled “flavour” with a “u,” which means that whoever wrote the caption was from somewhere that used that spelling, like New Zealand, rather than the United States.
News Hub’s source also claimed that Lorde is “well-known for having super short fingernails”—exactly like the ones holding the onion rings. Though this might be a stretch, you can’t deny that the onion rings fingers and Lorde’s fingers aren’t kinda-sorta identical. (Right?)
However, if you’re looking to stalk Lorde’s ~alleged~ onion ring ‘Gram—sorry, you’re out of luck. After News Hub approached Lorde’s management about the account, it quickly disappeared.
Though there is no *official* confirmation that Lorde is a total onion rings stan, we’re optimists and we want to believe the best in people—onion ring Instas and all.