Maybe you’ve had an unrequited crush on a guy who doesn’t like you back, or had a fling fizzle out into nothingness. Or maybe the guy you’ve been dating gave you the slow fade, and just kind of disappeared. Whatever the case, it totally sucks to get rejected, especially when you see a relationship as having a lot of potential. Why doesn’t he like me the way I like him, you wonder? How come he doesn’t see how great we’d be together?
It’s easy to feel pretty let down when someone you like doesn’t like you back, but it’s not the end of the world, we promise. And there are little things you can do to make it a bit easier on yourself.
Don’t take it personally
As crazy as that might sound, remember that getting rejection often has very little to do with you and much more to do with where the other person is in their life. Maybe your crush isn’t over their ex, or is legitimately interested in someone else. That isn’t about you—it’s about them. So as much as you might want to personalize the rejection, remember that a relationship requires two people to be invested, and you can only do your part.
Don’t worry about the ‘what ifs’
I shouldn’t have texted him so much. I should have baked him a cake for his birthday. I should have tried harder. You can beat yourself up trying to understand why someone doesn’t want to date you, but what’s that really going to get you? It’s not going to bring you any closer to actually being with that person, it’ll simply just give you more to fixate on. You can’t change what’s already happened, so the best thing you can do is learn to accept it.
Remember that the right person will be very aware of how great you are
You shouldn’t have to work to make someone fall in love with you. If someone is the right person for you, they’ll see how great you are without you having to constantly prove it to them all the time. If someone rejects you, don’t take it as a challenge to prove to them what they’re missing. Understand that for whatever reason they’re not properly equipped to see it for themselves, and try to move on.
Spend time with people who do think you’re awesome
Fixating on the one that got away (or the one you never had) is a great way to destroy your self-esteem and end up in a black hole of depression and despair. Sounds like a pretty fun place to be, no? Instead of spending time thinking about a guy who doesn’t think you’re great, why not spend time with friends and family who love you and think you’re wonderful? We think that’s an attractive alternative.