Let’s face it, breaking up isn’t easy, but sometimes it’s necessary. So when the time is right, we’re calling all ladies to channel their inner strength and, as the saying goes, be cruel to be kind. It’s cut throat time — no ifs, ands or buts about it. But the question remains–how do you say goodbye for good?
If you’ve recently reached the conclusion that it’s over, then there’s no reason to feel bad about cutting the strings. After all, the longer you wait the harder it will be. Need help? Here are ten ways to break it off:
1. Short & Sweet
It’s a little insensitive and we don’t recommend it unless it’s been a very short term relationship. This method is somewhat of a kiss-off. It’s when you meet your guy in the early evening, ready to go to dinner with your girls. They’re waiting in the cab and you’re planting a kiss on his cheek while saying, “It was fun, but things just aren’t meant to be.” You blow him a kiss, say “see you around,” and voila! Just like that, you’re unattached and ready for a fun-filled evening!
2. The Excuse
Excuses are probably the easiest thing to come up with, so use it to your advantage under these circumstances. Think of something debilitating and believable like the fact that your school or work has you on overload, leaving you short on personal time and close to a meltdown. Or, you can say that a boyfriend is something you can’t emotionally handle at the moment. Guys use that excuse all the time anyway, so don’t feel bad about it.
3. The Futuristic Way
You spend almost every waking hour on your computer and Blackberry or iPhone and you don’t necessarily care if you see your significant other ever again (including the time it would take to call it quits in person). Next time he texts, bbms or instant messages you with plans, respond with a simple, “Sorry, but I’m just not interested and don’t see this going anywhere.” He’ll probably call you or send a message back in response that has confusion written all over it. Be sensitive, but firm.
4. He’s a Jerk
So the guy did you wrong. The only thoughts that have his name attached to them are definitely not pretty. All you care about is getting him out of your life and fast. Simply look him in the eye, tell him it’s over, and walk out of there with your head held high and your dignity intact.
5. It’s not you it’s me…
This is an all-time classic. When using the “It’s not you, it’s me” exit stage right tactic, you simply have to be as firm as a brick wall. Tell him he’s a sweet guy, but you’ve got major life issues to deal with and when he opens his mouth to call your bluff, just say you’re serious and leave it at that.
6. I’ve met someone else…
This method is self explanatory and frequently happens. Instead of cheating on your current boyfriend, end it before being unfaithful. Tell him you’ve met someone else and that you’re sorry. Reassure him that he’s a good guy and say, “I’m sure you’ll meet someone great in the near future.”
7. The Artificial Fight
Most of us are already drama queens, whether we’d like to admit it or not. So do your best Oscar-worthy act and cause a commotion that’s enough to end things. You can get nit-picky and list all of the things that are just not worth your time in the relationship and tell him that it’s better off ending before it gets worse.
8. False Hopes
Another cop out, this method requires you to instill false hope in order to keep the peace. Tell the guy you have other things to focus on, but that maybe in the future you can re-cultivate the relationship. In this case, he’ll most likely have his reservations, but if he’s a nice guy he’ll give you the space you need.
9. Straight Forward
Don’t beat around the bush. Be straight forward and tell him it’s over because your feelings have changed. Do this in person and then leave after speaking your peace. It’s not fun, but it’s much more admirable. And everyone needs as much good dating karma as they can get.
Your dating a guy who you’ve realized would be a much better friend–BUT he really likes you. In this situation you don’t want to make up an excuse or give him false hope. Instead, meet him at his place and explain that you can’t see your life without him, but your feelings just don’t veer towards romantic anymore. If your friendship was strong to begin with, we’re betting it was a chance to survive.