9 Times Donald Trump’s Hair Has Tried to Run Away

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9 Times Donald Trump’s Hair Has Tried to Run Away
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Photo: Getty Images

As I’ve been flipping through pictures of Donald Trump throughout this election, I can’t help but notice something off about his appearance. Like, sure, he has the pallor of a stick of cream cheese rolled in crushed Cheetos, and sure, his suits are always a little bit too big (why? Why?!), and sure, there’s the weird smiling thing, but other than that, the thing I can’t stop thinking about is his hair.

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Because I think his hair might be alive. Or at least haunted by a thousand trapped ghosts yearning to be free of his insanity. Because if you look closely, in almost every picture featuring Trump’s hair—a.k.a. all of them—it seems to be subtly, yet very definitively, trying to escape. Whether it’s through organized coup d’etats across his forehead or in small, sneaky sections down his back, Donald Trump’s hair is forever attempting to run away…and is doing as well as you did when you “ran away” to the backyard in 3rd grade with a sack of apples and stickers.

So we combed (ha) through approximately one-trillion photos to find the most indicting photos of Trump’s haunted, rebellious hair to prove to you that each one of his strands is trying to escape. I know; the evidence is damning.

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That time when Trump's hair made a run for it out the back like a gang of scheming bandits.

Photo: instagram / @donald_trumphair

That time when the side sections of Trump's hair joined hands in solidarity as they braced for liftoff.

Photo: instagram / @trumps__hair

That time when Trump's hair yelled "SCATTER!" in an attempt to pull a fast one.

Photo: instagram / @toblertoo

That time when all of Trump's hair pretended to be a tumbleweed so it could sneakily roll off his head and into the ether.

Photo: instagram / @donald_trump_hair

That time when Trump's hair banded together and tried to fling itself off the front of his forehead.

Photo: instagram / @trumps__hair

That time when Trump's hair formed a single-file line and marched down his neck.

Photo: instagram / @eunicecastro777

That time when Trump's scalp offered the top of his hair up to the heavens for sacrifice.

Photo: instagram / @trumps__hair

That time when the front of Trump's hair split up to increase its odds of surviving the plunge.

Photo: instagram / @trumps__hair

That time when the back of Trump's hair staged a coup and rebelled against the front-line masses.

Photo: instagram / @trumps__hair

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