If, like me, you’re a hapless user of online dating apps, you’re probably well acquainted with the horrors that can accompany trying to find love on the interwebz—ghosting, an inordinate amount of creepiness, and the ubiquitous fuckboy. Let’s face it—it’s exhausting to swipe right so often. Plus, there’s the literal fatigue that comes from swiping and messaging people for hours on end, while lying upside down on your bed. Something tells me we weren’t made to hold and stare at small handheld devices all day long.
But never fear—Bliss Spa has come up with a solution to soothe any havoc that using a dating app may wreak on your (physical) being, because this is 2016 and the future is now. The cult-favorite spa is now offering a “Swipe Right Hand Massage” for anyone who might be overusing online dating apps and could use a little pampering. For 30 minutes (and a hot $80), your hands and arms can be exfoliated with a refreshing minty scrub and then massaged to give you some well-deserved TLC and a welcome oasis from the somewhat terrifying world of online dating.
According to Laura Ann Conroy, a massage therapist at Bliss Spa, preventative care is more important now than ever. “It’s important to take care of your hands and take preventative measures so injury does not occur,” Conroy said. “Our ‘swipe right’ massage addresses all that may ail the average overusing millennial.”
No word yet on the emotional benefits of the hand massage, but hey, at least your hands won’t be cramped from your swiping.