Last night on E!, the Kardashians returned to their post as the reigning queens of Sunday night television. Yes, that’s right. The hotly anticipated/protested season premiere of Kourtney and Kim Take New York kicked off with a bang.
The show opened with a dramatic montage of news clips regarding Kim‘s decision to file from divorce for hubby of 72 days Kris Humphries. Then, the screen fades to black — and a rather mysterious “8 weeks earlier” appears. We are thrust into Kim and Kris’s newlywed, er, bliss (canoodling on private jets, foreplay on Kimmy’s California King bed, the usual), but as soon as the duo arrives in New York to move in with sister Kourtney, her boyfriend Scott Disick, and their glorious child Mason, it all goes downhill.
The editors have a clear direction for this season: to catch Kris looking like a doofy, obnoxious jerk. Now, this isn’t hard, considering his toolish tendencies make Scott look like Mother Teresa. But honestly, it isn’t that shocking that he farts in Kourtney’s face, or freaks out at a nude yoga instructor in the apartment. By far the most appalling aspect of Kris’ behavior was his treatment of his new nephew Mason. This should have been a red flag right away, and Kim should havetorn up the marriage documents and sent him packing.
Firstly, Mason is actually the cutest, most wonderful child to grace the world. And now that he’s talking, his stock is only rising. I’m sorry, if you didn’t coo “aww” when Mason said “New York!” on the balcony, you have a heart of stone and you need to reevaluate your priorities.
Kris freaking out that Masey’s playroom was near his bedroom was also absolutely absurd. Sure, it’s a little annoying to have a baby around when you have to get up early, but dude. Be grateful that your wife is bank-rolling your entire life.
At first I was skeptical about this divorce, but after the Mason debacle, I’m back on Team Kim. (Ugh, those E! editors…masterminds.)